November 20, 2013

October 18, 2013

A day off

I got pretty sick this week. It peaked this morning, so we went in to the urgent care clinic and I was diagnosed with strep and mono. Boohoo. But today has been one of those really sweet days. Let me 'splain...

I would have gone to my internship this morning had I been well. Instead, Tom has been driving me around, running errands, making me dinner and yummy smoothies, and taking care of Emmitt. After we had dinner tonight, Tom decided he would go into work to make up for my lost hours. Emmitt watched him get ready and listened as Tom explained he was going "bye bye". Emmitt then opened up his arms, so Tom picked him up. Then Emmitt looked at me and waved "bye bye". He was obviously going with Dad. Tom smiled, then put him down to put his shoes on. Emmitt helped, then pointed at a pair of his little shoes and brought them to Tom. I could see Tom cracking little by little.

Once Emmitt's shoes were on, he asked to be picked up again. Tom sat Emmitt on his lap for a minute and then looked at me with big eyes. "Do you think maybe we could go to the park instead?"

And that's why I love Tom.

August 30, 2013

Recent Happenings

I'm not so sure I gave this blog the right name. A more fitting name would be "Taja's Ramblings" since I haven't been very good at updating lately. Forgive me.

So we finally were able to get it together enough to take family pictures. It's a bit ridiculous, but I've tried to schedule photos more than three times in the last year or so. Something always got in the way. Then I ran into an old friend at a work picnic for the company our husbands work for. She's a photographer and so I told her I was interested and she wasted no time in getting things ready. Thanks Jileisa!

Check her out! http://www.jileisajoyphotography.blogspot.com/












In other news, Tom is still working on grad school stuffs, I've been offered an internship close to home *hallelujah*, Emmitt is his happy, cute self, and we're getting along just fine!



Tough work, being super




New favorite passtime

Grad School Adventures

Tom has been going through the interview process for Physician's Assisting. So far, he has been to Pennsylvania and we all went to Arizona. The Arizona trip ended early this morning after an all-night drive that we've vowed to never do again. We've driven through the night once before on the way back from California, but that was when we were young and childless. Adding a small person to the mix makes things a bit more complicated. Emmitt has decided that screaming is a pretty fun way to use his voice...especially in a close space such as the car. Our ears had about had it by the time we reached Mesa. On the way back though, Tom explained to him in big-people language that he needed to stop the screaming and that we were very sorry we couldn't play with him just now. It was then that we realized Emmitt understands much more than we give him credit for because he kept crying softly, but the screaming stopped and he fell asleep shortly after. The only problem was we had to keep ourselves awake to drive the rest of the night.

Tom's grandparents let us stay with them on the way down. They live in St. George and it was the perfect half-way point. Emmitt absolutely loved Grandpa Allphin. It was so fun getting to know them better since the only time I've been able to talk to them was at our wedding luncheon. They put us up in a comfy bed and fed us some delicious homemade bread and pozole (sp?) and then french toast for breakfast. We are quite spoiled.

Have you ever heard of Hotwire.com? Tom's mom suggested it to us and we've always been pleasantly surprised at the deals we find. Hotwire is a travel agency of sorts that has deals with hotels all over. If a hotel hasn't been able to fill it's rooms, it gives a lower price to Hotwire and they pass the deal on to you. At least, I think that's how it works. You don't know what hotel you're staying in when you see the price, but you can ask for a minimum rating. We went with four stars for 70 bucks and we ended up in a pretty ritzy resort with the best pool, big rooms, and (my favorite part) free warm chocolate chip walnut cookies at check-in! (:
Not too shabby, eh?
For the record, and for my mom, these pictures are courtesy of some website. I am not the type to take a picture of my hotel room and then forget about grandparents, husband, and child.











Anyway, Tom went off to his interview leaving Emmitt and me to tour the little campus. Arizona's really pretty. I didn't take any pictures, surprise surprise, but we loved the palm trees and the mountains. I'm afraid that living in Idaho my whole life has made me kind of cold blooded, though. I like a warm day as much as anybody, but I define warm as 80-90 degrees. Above that, it's just too uncomfortable. Mesa was really warm and humid the day we were there.

The interview went well and I it was a good experience for Tom. We were sad to cut our little vacation short, but on the way back, we had an anniversary dinner. Our second anniversary is coming up, but Tom will be back in Arizona at another University, so we had to celebrate early. It was a nice break in the drive.

I take it back, I took one photo with Tom's phone. A double rainbow. You're welcome.
What does it mean?!!



August 6, 2013

It's true, isn't it? Then what else matters?



I wanted to share something that has made all the difference in my life. Without it, I wouldn't be who I am and I wouldn't have found the happiness and peace I know today. It is the Gospel of Jesus Christ.
I'd like to relate a story that I've always loved. It is an experience from Gordon B. Hinckley, a past prophet of my church.

I met a naval officer from a distant nation, a brilliant young man who had been brought to the United States for advanced training. Some of his associates in the United States Navy, whose behavior had attracted him, shared with him at his request their religious beliefs. He was not a Christian, but he was interested. They told him of the Savior of the world, Jesus Christ, born in Bethlehem, who gave his life for all mankind. They told him of the appearance of God, the Eternal Father, and the resurrected Lord to the boy Joseph Smith. They spoke of modern prophets. They taught him the gospel of the Master. The Spirit touched his heart, and he was baptized.
He was introduced to me just before he was to return to his native land. We spoke of these things, and then I said: “Your people are not Christians. What will happen when you return home a Christian, and, more particularly, a Mormon Christian?”

His face clouded, and he replied, “My family will be disappointed. They may cast me out and regard me as dead. As for my future and my career, all opportunity may be foreclosed against me.”

I asked, “Are you willing to pay so great a price for the gospel?”

His dark eyes, moistened by tears, shone from his handsome brown face as he answered, “It’s true, isn’t it?”

Ashamed at having asked the question, I responded, “Yes, it’s true.”

To which he replied, “Then what else matters?”

 I love this story because of the diligence and faith shown by the young man. There are lots of questions that I don't know how to answer. There are issues so complicated that any solution doesn't completely solve the problem. Sometimes I feel like questions are being fired at me by those who aren't really looking for an answer, rather looking to tear at my beliefs and it frustrates me. And not just because those questions are to be hurtful or make me look stupid, but because I honestly don't have the answers.

But then I remember that another word for Religion is Faith. And Faith is believing something or acting on something that you're not 100% sure to be true or right, at least not by yourself. Why do I rely on faith? Because it works.

The biggest decisions I've made in my life like where to go to college, who to marry, and when to have children never came with a clear-cut "yes or no" revelation. But with each tiny step towards making a decision, I felt more and more sure of what was right. That's how faith works. We don't just wait around for Heavenly Father to tell us how and when to act. We take small steps in what we think is the right direction. If we're right, we'll feel at peace. If we're wrong, we will backtrack and come away with new experiences that teach us things we may not learn any other way.

Perhaps the hardest concept involving faith is accepting that we may not receive all the answers in this life. For example, I had a really hard time understanding why African American men were not allowed to hold the Priesthood before 1978. I also had a hard time with the church's history of polygamy. I still don't have an answer as to why, but through study and talking to trusted individuals, I know those practices were commanded of God. I have my own theories as to why these things were commanded, but I don't often share them because (1) they aren't in Mormon Doctrine, (2) I'm not through with my studying, and (3) everyone needs to ask their own questions about their doubts with a sincere heart and a desire to believe in order to gain a true testimony and strengthen faith.

Now, there's a big difference between swallowing everything you're fed and accepting things in faith. Faith isn't ignorance. Rather, it's asking and learning and still believing in the time between not knowing the answer and getting an answer. It's believing God is mindful of you and your doubts and that his way of teaching you is the very best way, even if it's not in your timetable. Testimony that is based on belief without question is not very strong. The adversary can use his own questions that poke holes in testimony and feed fear instead of faith. In order to illustrate what I'm trying to say, I made a little graph. (Don't make fun, I'm far from being an artist.) I've seen something like it before, but I couldn't remember where.

In the upper left, a person asks easy questions. They have a testimony, but it's not very strong because they don't study and they ignore the hard questions until somebody gives them an answer they believe to be true. It's too easy to be led astray in this quadrant and this testimony won't stand against the storms and trials.

In the bottom left, the questions asked are all fearful. They are the "what-ifs" and they demand answers on our schedule, rather than the Lord's. If that timing isn't met, then the person concludes that the doctrine must not be true. Eventually, these questions lead to falling away.

In the bottom right, we again have both faithful and fearful questions. People in this quadrant have a desire to believe the doctrine, but they won't let go of the doubts. They study, but they listen to two sources (Matt 6:24). They won't take a step of faith and test the principles they've been taught, so they get stuck and can't progress, leading to frustration and more doubt.

The top right quadrant includes people who have tested the things they've been taught in the church and have found them to be true. They let those experiences fuel their faith and continue to progress at an exponential rate as long as they keep asking faithful questions. You can find joy in this quadrant.

People in all four quadrants experience trials and sadness. We all go through times of weakness and we've probably all experienced all four areas on the graph. It is my hope that we can all get a taste of the upper right quadrant so that we want to go back for more. The doctrine of Jesus Christ and his Atonement, the Father and Son's love for us, and the still small voice of the Holy Ghost to confirm it all are the way to happiness in this life.

I'll leave you with this talk: Lord, I Believe

And I hope you have a lovely day!

June 17, 2013

Happy

These are some of the things that have made me really happy lately:
-I get home from school and Emmitt hears the front door close from somewhere in the house. He comes crawling out of a room at full speed with big eyes and raised eyebrows. He stops when he sees me, smiles, squeals, then starts crawling again as fast as he can.
-Watching Tom sneak up on Emmitt as they chase each other around the couch on all fours.
-Whenever Tom gets home from work.
-Finding a bunch of sales at the grocery store that allow me to buy way more than I planned and still stay under budget.
-Baking dessert.
-When I get to my class a minute and thirty seconds late and the teacher starts class 2 minutes late.
-Hearing from my family on the phone.
-Having dinner with friends.
-This: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gODZzSOelss
-Putting off homework to write a blog post.

April 9, 2013

Prayers are answered!

Hey All! Phewf! it's been a long time since I've written! I hope you are all enjoying the start of your Spring! Things are getting green and warm here in Idaho.

The semester is coming to a close and to say we are relieved would be the underest of understatements. At the beginning of the semester, I wasn't really sure if we could pull it off, but we'd both had comfort and encouragement that we could pull through. When the time came, we kind of just shut our eyes and dove in. This is the first and last semester both Tom and I will have classes on campus as parents. 

In general, I've learned that I need to enjoy my life, no matter how crazy and hectic it gets. I also need to keep up with the little things that give me strength every day like prayer. That has made all the difference and I believe it got us through these difficult 4 months. I won't go into too much detail about how crazy things were this semester, since I know everyone has hectic lives. (I feel like the kid in Elder Cook's talk: "Hope ya know, we had a hard time." Here's the link to that if you wanna watch it: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wz41YxNiHEg)

Anyway, I'll just tell the story of the last few weeks. 

As Tom and I were juggling parenting, school, work, and marriage, I started to worry that I wouldn't be able to pass one of my classes. I've always taken my grades pretty seriously, so this prospect really depressed me. I was wondering why Tom and I had received the comfort that we did, since retaking this class would throw off the rest of my planned semesters and possibly make it so I couldn't graduate before we go off to Tom's PA school. Also, (and I'm ashamed of this) I wondered where the blessings were from following the counsel to get my degree and following the commandment of raising a family.  I felt guilty doing my homework because I couldn't spend as much time with Emmitt and I felt stressed playing with Emmitt because homework was due.There were times that I was really short-sighted and didn't appreciate how full my life is because of my family.


Anyway, the class I wasn't doing so hot in is an excel VBA class (Programming in Excel). I thought it was interesting and I enjoyed the work. Even though I understood the material, though, it took time. And I didn't have a lot of that. We were given 3 weeks and each day, I'd think, "Ok, I'll give it 2 hours today," but after all was said and done, Tom and I would end up exhausted in bed after midnight and my project wasn't getting any doner.

The final week before the due date arrived and Tom (who is my hero) took two full days off of work and devoted all of that time to playing with Emmitt. (He probably had more homework than me.) While Emmitt took a nap, he'd sit by me and encourage me and have me explain what I was doing so that I could understand what needed to be done next. I got a lot done in those two days, but about a 3rd of the project was still not finished. The night before the project was due, I sadly submitted what I had done, knowing it wasn't good enough to get my grade to a C-

The next few days I refocused on my other classes and tried to come to terms with the looming F. I scheduled my appointment with my teacher to go over the project and tried to look at the bright side. At least the course was almost over and I only had one more online assignment for it. The Friday appointment came and I was kind of embarrassed to sit in my  professor's office where he would find out I'd be repeating the class

There's some background on my professor you need to know. He has a reputation in the accounting department of being very unforgiving. A "no excuses" kind of guy. However, when I sat in his office, he was very kind and complimented me on the work I did get done for the project. He still agreed with the grade I gave myself though, (a 69.9%) typed it into my overall grade and said, "You are so close..." In my head I was thinking, "Don't add insult to injury. Just let me take my paper and I'll just go. No need to explain how I need to work harder next time! SERIOUSLY, I'm not going to CRY! IT'S FINE, I'LL BE O--"
"You have until Monday at 8 AM."
Wait, what?
"You work on it and get as many points as you can and I'll let you resubmit it in an email."
After I sat there for a minute, pouring out yessirs and thankyous, he said, "Don't tell anyone." Didn't want anyone to think he'd gone soft.

I went home and Tom (again) dedicated all of his time to Emmitt. On Monday at 1 AM, I submitted a completed project. I was so proud of it, too! The next day I started the last assignment around 7 PM and realized it would take me all night, but I got it done. Today, my grade updated to a 76.65%. Tears were shed, hugs were given, cheers went up, toasts were made, the band burst into song...

Ok, not really. But really, I'm happier about this C than I have ever been or ever will be about an A++. I am so grateful for an understanding professor, a sweet baby, a wonderful husband, and a caring Heavenly Father.


I also have to mention my good friend Chloe who watched Emmitt for us for half an hour twice a week. She is such a kind person. We often joke that she got more pictures of Emmitt than I did this semester...actually it's not a joke. 

Speaking of pictures, here's an update!

Emmitt in his snappy suit from Grandma




Who you callin' tiny?






Blowing Bubbles and Flying Kites for Easter









Tom: Hey, did you get my shadow?
Tom: Taj! Taj, did you get my shadow?


Emmitt: Oh Dad...

We got a little bored with the kite flying so this kind gentleman took over.





I need to get more of these!